Rediscovering the Good in the Marriage Institution (Rev. Ejide Eme) 28-10-2016

★ MY SERMON NOTES

@ Family Worship Centre (FWC)

Wuye, Abuja

28th October, 2016

COUPLE'S RETREAT 

(Day One: 1st Session)

Rev. Ejibe Eme
Picture Credit: FWC Media

☆ SERMON

* Speaker: Rev. Ejibe Eme

* Topic: Rediscovering the Good in the Marriage Institution

* Text: Genesis 2:7-25

* Rediscovery is a process of seeking out what the original plan of a thing is

☆ Discovery arises when there is:

1. Confusion

→ Today, there is much confusion about marriage institution

→ Civilization has worsened the confusion

→ Many perversions have been introduced to undermine the sanctity of marriage

2. Damage

→ To repair a damage, you need to refer back to the original manual of the product

→ The manual for marriage is the Bible

☆ Points to note:

* 1. At the institution of marriage at Eden, everything was provided (material wealth was is abundance)

→ NOTE: The presence or absence of material wealth is not enough to determine the good or structure of marriage

→ There is something about marriage that money cannot provide

2. God is the sole initiator of marriage

→ The design of marriage precedes civilization and human knowledge

★ Acts 17:26

→ Man cannot have a superior design more than God

→ God's design predates your village tradition & customs

☆ The Principles that can bring out the good in Marriage:

→ For anything to be good, it must follow the right principles and specifications (as predetermined by the initiator or manufacturer)

1. The God Factor and the Divine Agenda (Genesis 2:21)

→ "God made"

→ "God caused deep sleep"

→ "God brought her to Adam"

* NOTE: God is deliberately involved in your marriage

→ He has an agenda for your marriage

→ He has an interest in your interest

→ He is a major stakeholder/shareholder in your family affairs

* God always works behind the scenes to establish and sustain marriage

★ Malachi 2:14 →"Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant."

* NOTE: The consciousness that God is a constant witness in your marriage should cause you to be mindful of how you treat your spouse

★ Malachi 2:15 →"And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.''

* A seed is a deposit that will produce more harvest

→ when God is looking for bountiful harvest, he plants seeds in godly families!

* God always searches for a man and woman whom He can trust and entrust them with His godly seed

* NOTE: Examples of the 'seeds' God planted in godly families:

(a) Moses (see: Exodus 2:1-2)

(b) Samson (see: Judges 13:2)

(b) John the Baptist (see: Luke 1:5)

(c) Jesus Christ (see: Matthew 1:18)

* Question: Where are the families that God can trust today?

* Satan is always targeting the structure of marriages to bring it down

→ he aims at destroying the psyche of our children (eg, by planting them in homes with homosexual 'parents'. They will not be able to appreciate the sanctity of marriage as they grow up)

★ Psalm 11:3 →"When the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?" (ISV)

★ Psalm 127:3

→ Your children are a gift from the Lord and you must protect them from the perversions of the world

* God has a divine arrangement for a woman to bring joy to the man

→ A woman carries destiny and births it!

⇒ Women play important roles in the godly upbringing of children

★ Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

→ A man a woman are meant to compliment each other

2. The Covenant Factor in the Union

★ Genesis 2:23

→ Marriage is not a business contract (that may be terminated when the conditions are not favorable)

→ Marriage breaks the covenant of birth (leave father and Mother)

→ It is not a social arrangement between two people to co-exist

* Marriage is not about compatibility (it is virtually impossible for two different people to be totally compatible)

→ That is why it is a mystery

→ Two different personalities becoming one

* What the world cannot understand, they try to develop a new theory

3. The Mystery of Oneness

→ In marriage, the two different personalities have collapsed into one!

→ This is what the world does not understand

★ Matthew 19:4-6

* God's plan is for the couples to be ONE in everything

→ If your wife does not know something about you, then you are not one!

* A sane person would never maltreat or insult himself

* Whenever there is anything wrong with your marriage, somebody or something is intruding

* Your marriage is your life!

→ You should do all that is possible to preserve, protect and nourish it

* When there is oneness, you will always feel the pain of your spouse

* NOTE: You must keep an eye on the devil

→ Question: What is the devil sponsoring to undermine your marriage covenant?

* You must understand the tricks of the devil and guard against them

☆ Questions for Personal Reflection:

→ Can God brag about your marriage?

→ If God is looking for a family that He will use as a model to convince unbelievers that His principles of marriage are timeless and enduring, can He send them your way?

→ SINGLES: If God is about to send a seed into the world, can He trust you with it?

Couple's Retreat (Exhortation) Mr. Sunny Ekunwe 20-10-2016

★ MY SERMON NOTES

@ Family Worship Centre (FWC)

Wuye, Abuja

28th October, 2016

COUPLE'S RETREAT 

(Day One: Friday)

☆ PRAYER SESSION (EXHORTATION)

* Leader: Mr. Sunny Ekunwe

* Text: 1 Peter 5:8 →"Be clear-minded and alert. Your opponent, the devil, is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour."

* The devil is seeking the man in which he will embarrass

→ You need to be vigilant and prayerful at all times

* The devil has no power over a man who knows this rights in Christ!

☆ Three (3) Points to Note if you are to have a Successful Marriage:

1. Be Knowledgeable about God's word

→ Everything you need is in God's Word

2. You should be a person of Prayer

★ Luke 18:1 → "Jesus told his disciples a parable about their need to pray all the time and never give up."

→ Heaven is moved when men pray!

* A man must not relegate the duty of prayer to his wife

→ Do not relinguish your priesthood

3. God desires that men should provide for the family

→ God's endorsement is upon the man to fulfil the mandate of provision

The will of God (Evangelist Lewis Dam) 07-05-2016

★ MY SERMON NOTES

@ Ecumenical Christian Centre,

Central Area,

Behind Central Bank of Nigeria - Abuja,

7th May, 2016

☆ Marriage Between

Barr. Prizing Binwai & Grace Barde

Evangelist Lewis Dam

SERMON

* Speaker: Evangelist Lewis Dam

* Topic: The will of God

* Text: 1 John 2:17 →"And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever." (NKJV)

* In this generation, many marriages are 'upside down' because they do not understand nor walk in the will of God

★ Ecclesiastes 12:13 →''The last and final word is this: Fear God. Do what he tells you." (MSG)

* The most damnable thing in life is not death

→ It is life outside the will of God

* It is impossible for a man to find fulfilment outside the will of God

* Foolish people think they are free to do whatever they like outside of God

* Gone are the days whereby young people travel into marriage on their knees. Today, they travel into marriage on their feelings

* Many people do not take the time and the pains to discover God's will for marriage before they make the commitment

* Many marriages in Church are founded on deciet

* One of the most foolish questions in life is "what will people say?"

→ Because of other people's opinions, many become frustrated and even kill themselves

→ The people whom you worry about their opinions do not really care about you

* Fulfillment and genuine success does not come from man's ingenuity, but by walking in God's will

* You must be mindful of what God says, not what people think

★ Hebrews 10:36 →  "You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised."
 

* There is a promise for those who do and obey the Word of God

★ 1 John 2:17 → "The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever."
 

* Most Church marriages end in divorce (or separation) because of selfishness  

→ Many people enter into marriage only to please themselves.

→ They lie to themselves, their friends, their families and the Church that they are God's will for each other

★ John 6:38 → "For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me."
 

★ John 16:13 → "But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come."

★ Jeremiah 23:21 →  "I did not send these prophets, yet they have run with their message;I did not speak to them, yet they have prophesied."  

* God was upset at Priests that ran with messages when they have not heard from God

* A good sermon is comprised of a message from God delivered to a targeted audience by a faithful messenger

* There is no marriage that succeeds without the ability to hear God clearly  

* Each day you will be confronted with decisions either to do your will or God's will

* The Holy Spirit helps us to hear and obey God always

* The best and most successful couples are those who wake up every day, ready to die to themselves and submit to God's will

★ Is doing God's will easy?

→ It is not easy, but it brings the best rewards in the end

* God rewards a believer for doing what asks him/her to do

→ You cannot decide to do what you want to do and expect God to reward or bless you

* The greatest pleasure in life is to know and do God's will

 

* Some people live through life only labouring for their stomachs

* Do not allow the history of your life to be written on the lives of others

→ Allow God to write your own history for you

* You can hear what people say, but do not listen to them

* NOTE: Anything done with the spirit of unforgiveness does not have God's blessings

 

Barr. & Mrs. Prizing Binwai

 

Responsibilities of Spouses (Husband) 05-05-2016

★ MY SERMON NOTES

Christian Couples Fellowship (CCF)

Lugbe Group, Abuja Zone

5th May, 2016

* Topic: Responsibilities of the Husband

* Leader: Barr. Panshak Haggai

 

1. The Husband as Father:

(a) Training (Proverbs 22:6; Deuteronomy 6:1-6)

- Training is a process of inculcating moral, spiritual, physical and economic (etc) values in children

- The difference between teaching and training is that teaching involves passing of information (whether learning occurs or not) while training is a sort of continuous discipleship whereby the character of a child is transformed

 

* For training to be effective: 

- It must be practical (children learn more from what they observe in their parent's lives)

- It must be consistent

- It must be done with a specific goal in mind

(b) Discipline (Proverbs 13:24; Ephesians 6:4)

* Discipline is a process of correcting a child when a wrong occurs

 

* Principles to note in Child Discipline:

- do not discipline a child to the point that he/she becomes provoked or discouraged

- ensure that you explain why you are disciplining the child

- discipline must be done in love

- always consider the age and temperament of a child in choosing an appropriate form of discipline

- a parent must not always over-react when children does wrong

- both parents must be one while disciplining their children. They must always be on the same side!

 

(c) Encourage & Exhort (Colossians 3:21)

- Children need to be constantly encouraged

- Parents must be wary of the words they use against their children especially when they fail in school or are not performing as good as their peers

- Your words should always be gracious towards your children

- When a parent is harsh, a child may be pushed to rebellion

2. The Husband as Head and Provider

(a) Hardwork (1 Timothy 5:8)

- It is the sole responsibility of the Husband to provide for the home

- A man must not be lazy

- When the husband's income or job is affected, the wife should support him if she is able

- A woman who becomes the breadwinner of the family  must not look down on her husband and she must not cause the children to disrespect him

(b) Pastor of the House (Deuteronomy 6:1-6; Job 1:1-5; Joshua 24:14-15)

- The husband is the Priest of his own home and he is expected to take the lead in spiritual matters  

- The spiritual wellbeing of the family is the husband's primary responsibility.

- He must always take the lead in family worship

- He must not abandon that duty to his wife, though she may support him  

- His goal should be to ensure that everyone in his house makes heaven

Joint Heirs to the Kingdom of God (Dr. Patrick Dakum) 26-11-2015

★ MY SERMON NOTES

Christian Couples Fellowship (CCF),

End of Year Combined Fellowship,

Abuja Zone,

@ Mungo-Park Garden, off Gimbiya Crescent, Area 11,

FCT - Abuja, Nigeria

26th November, 2015

☆ EXHORTATION

* Speaker: Dr. Patrick Dakum

* Topic: Joint Heirs to the Kingdom of God

* Text: 1 Peter 3:1-7

* NOTE: Yourself and your wife are joint heirs of the Kingdom of God

* This means that you both have a responsibility to uphold each other spiritually

 

* You would not be happy if you see your spouse in hell

* The problem that couples face is a global one

* At the point you become married, you have become one

→ NOTE: Becoming one is a process because marriage involves two different people that must adjust to each other

* If you have to properly adjust to each other, you must be able to understand each other, complement each other and uphold each other

* A man must take his place and discharge responsibility as the Priest & provider of the home

* A wife must comport herself in such a manner that her life is attractive to God

* Wives: learn to trust God for the change that you want to see in your husband

→ Place emphasis on developing inner beauty

* Wives: If you want your husband to treat as a queen, you must treat Him as a King

→ You must not disrespect Him [Esther 1:9-18]

* Husbands: You must treat your wife with consideration

* Violence against women is one of the worse things that a man can ever do!

→ A Christian man must never disrespect a woman by beating and oppressing her

* NOTE: Your wife is not your servant or your cook.

→ She is your partner and a helpmate

* You must not use your wife in a harsh way, but you must help her and treat her with

★ Joel 2:28 → "And it shall come to pass afterward, that I will pour out my spirit upon all flesh; and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your old men shall dream dreams, your young men shall see visions."

→ The same spirit that is in you is the same spirit that your wife has

★ Assignment: Evaluate your family:

1. How has this year being?

2. Have we been able to achieve our goals for this year?

3. What are the goals we want to achieve next year?

4. What are your spiritual plans for the family?

5. Do you have any plans for academic advancement?

→ Do not go into the next year accidentally without a plan.

* NOTE: Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance

The Use of Gadgets in the Home (Dr. Patrick Dakum) 27-11-2014

Christian Couples Fellowship (CCF)

Combined Meeting (Abuja Zone) 

@ Sasha's Garden,

Area 11, Garki Abuja

27th November, 2014

EXHORTATION

* Speaker: Dr. Patrick Dakum

* Topic: The Use of Gadgets in the Home

* Couples should make every effort to maintain communication in every situation - even where there is a conflict between them

* Some of the issue of use of phones in the family that causes friction between couples:

- Phones that are switched off or unreachable when the other spouse needs to be reached/contacted

- delayed reply to SMS/missed calls

- checking of phones of the other spouse (messages, picture gallery, call logs, etc)

★ Tips on the use of Communication Gadgets

1. The internet world contains a lot of good and bad - ensure you know how to benefit from the good and avoid the bad

2. Learn about communication gadgets better so that you Know how to use them positively

3. Never allow any gadget to get in between your relationship with your spouse

★ The Commitments that Christian Couples must make:

(a) Commitment to God by the spouses

- Know that God will require you to account for how you use the gadgets that you have

- Biblical stewardship is all encompassing (including use of our possessions, time & money)

- The telephone & other gadgets Should never replace physical intimacy

- Your commitment to God will determine how you use your gadgets

(b) Commitment to use your gadgets for building and not for tearing down each other

- It is possible to make a commitment to encourage, say kind words, build love, etc

- If your love for your spouse does not affect your pocket, you are only joking!

- Every commitment will cost you Something

(c) Commitment to respect for each other

- It is a sign respect to create time for each other and not allow gadgets to get is the way

(d) Commitment to each other

- Don't replace your physical contact with gadgets

- Don't measure your love for each other with communication quantum over gadgets

- Don't make a big issue out of the usage of gadgets

* Note: No family can ever have a perfect scenario of communication but there must be a definite commitment among spouses to love and build each other all the time

A Christian Home (Pastor 'Lola Owotumi) 30-09-2014

NDIC/DMO Chapel,
Central Business District,
Garki-Abuja, Nigeria
30th September, 2014

* Speaker: Pastor 'Lola Owotumi
* Topic: A Christian Home

★ Romans 11:13-14 → "For I speak to you Gentiles, inasmuch as I am the apostle of the Gentiles, I magnify mine office: If by any means I may provoke to emulation them which are my flesh, and might save some of them."

* In a family, there are different "offices"

* Every one in the family must recognize their roles & magnify their offices

* "Every Joint must Supply" → No member of the family should be lacking in doing what he/she is required to do

★ As a Christian, you must not:
(a) Desecrate Your office
(b) Relegate Your office
(c) Diminish Your office

* Verse 14 : Provoke your family members to promote good things
- Note that children always watch What you do and try to replicate same in their own lives

* Concentrate on your own office. Do not be distracted by anything

* Do not take over another person's office

* Ephesians 5:21 →"Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God."

WIFE
★ Ephesians 5:22-24

* A wise woman builds her own house

★ Proverbs14:1 - "Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands"

* Submission is required of wives

* Such submission is done as unto the Lord, not man (the Husband)

★ 1st Peter 3:1-6

* If wives obey God, He will make their husbands to do their bidding

★ Isaiah 51:1-2 →" Hearken to me, ye that follow after righteousness, ye that seek the LORD: look unto the rock whence ye are hewn, and to the hole of the pit whence ye are digged. Look unto Abraham your father, and unto Sarah that bare you: for I called him alone, and blessed him, and increased him."

* Christian women must not rely on their own understanding or wisdom to make their marriages/homes work

HUSBAND
* He is expected to be the "saviour" of the wife

* The husband should always provide for the family

The Place of the Holy Spirit in the Christian Home (Pastor Francis) 05-07-2014

★ MY SERMON NOTES

Wedding - Umushe Jane Matta & Naanlong

@ ECWA Plateau Church, Laminga Road,

Jos, Plateau State - Nigeria

5th July, 2014

SERMON

* Speaker: Pastor Francis  

* Topic: The Place of the Holy Spirit in the Christian Home

* Christian marriage is based on sacred promises & vows

* Today, many couples have abandoned their marriage vows

* There is a call on every Christian couple to go back to the basics - which is the Word of God

* We must get back to the original plan of God for marriage

* The world has been trying to redefine marriage by introducing and promoting strange perversions in the marriage institution with a view to undermine God's standards

* The Christian home is under attack from the secular movement and carnal philosophies

★ Colossians 3:2 → "Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth."

★ Ephesians 4:1 →"I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called."

★ Ephesians 4:17 →"This I say therefore, and testify in the Lord, that ye henceforth walk not as other Gentiles walk, in the vanity of their mind."

* Our values as Christian couples/families must portray the light of Christ

* We must not be influenced by the world

* Only the distinction that we have in Christ can draw the World to Christ

★ Ephesians 5:18 → "And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit."

* What is lacking today, making Christians a far-cry from what God wants us to be is the fact that the Holy Spirit has been relegated to the background in our personal affairs

* It takes the Holy Spirit to be able to love someone outside of yourself

* The "Adamic man" (the unreformed heart) is naturally selfish

* Today, there is no difference between Christians & those who are not

* The hope of this Country is not in political ideologies but in Christians who live up to the calling of God upon their lives

* We are often too preoccupied with living life and pursuing our businesses to live in the Spirit

* When the Holy Spirit controls a man, He Submits to his wife in love; When the Holy Spirit controls a woman, she submits to her husband with respect & without compulsion

* NOTE: Bacchus is the god of wine & intoxication

-When a person is drunk, his body is open to control from the demonic influence of Bacchus to do his will

* When the Holy Spirit controls you, your hope will be established in righteousness

* 1st Corinthians 12:13 →"For by one Spirit are we all baptized into one body, whether we be Jews or Gentiles, whether we be bond or free; and have been all made to drink into one Spirit."

* The Holy Spirit indwells only persons who have accepted Jesus as their Lord & Saviour

* The 'in-filling' with the Holy Spirit is different from being "baptized" with the Holy Spirit

* God is looking for those who are constantly being filled with the Holy Spirit

* When The Holy Spirit is in control, Jesus has a say in the family affairs

* When you are truly submitted to the Holy Spirit, He gives you what to input into Your marriage, so that you're not just looking for what you will get out of it.

* The Holy Spirit must be the centre of attraction in your home & marriage

* The Holy Spirit can reconcile and restore all that is lost

How to know Whether a Person is controlled by the Holy Spirit:

1. Joy (Christian Joy is internal stability despite external instability)

2. Gratitude & thankfulness

3. Submission

★JOY

* Joy is the evidence of a true Christian home

* Joy regulates the spiritual atmosphere of a situation

* Joy insulates your heart against being carried away by the circumstances of life

* Alcohol is a temporary depressant which brings no permanent Solution

★THANKFULNESS

* Ephesians 5:20 →"Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."

* A person who comes to terms with the fact that he cannot become what he now is without the help and input of others is never grateful

* You must learn the principle of constant gratitude in the Christian home

★ SUBMISSION

* One institution that humbles a man is marriage because it offers plenty opportunities for serving each other selflessly

* Ephesians 5:21-22

* The man is actually called to submit to his wife in love

* The wife is called to submit to her husband in respect

* Christian couples are to submit to Christ out of reverence

* Submissiveness does not disturb the established order of authority

* Serving the interest of another is anti-world system where selfishness is the order of the day

* How is your home today?

* What is the place of the Holy Spirit in your home & life?

We are Partners, not Rivals (Rev. David Pofi) 15-08-2013

COUPLE’S FELLOWSHIP ANNUAL RETREAT

15^TH – 18^TH AUGUST, 2013

MIANGO REST HOME

DAY ONE: THURSDAY, 15^TH AUGUST, 2013

 

OPENING CHARGE

Topic: We are Partners, not Rivals

Speaker: Rev. David Pofi

Text: 1 Corinthians 3:1-9

 

An overview of the Opening Charges of the Christian Couples Fellowship Retreat from 2010:

2010 Opening Charge:

Things that only God can do:

1.    Unless the Lord builds your home, the builders build in vain. [Psalms 127:1]

2.    Unless the Lord watches over your home, you watch in vain

3.    Only the Lord can bless your children.

 

2011 Opening Charge:

Ø  Luke15:11-19

Ø  If you are disconnected from the Lord, you will never be full.

Ø  When a man/woman is disconnected from God (the Father), they become prodigal and cannot connect with each other appropriately.

Ø  When a family is disconnected from God, they beg when they are not supposed to beg.    

 

2012 Opening Charge:

*Ephesians 1:4, 7, 13 & 14

Ø  We were created by God for His pleasure, but sin separated us from Him.

Ø  God paid again for our sins in order to purchase us back to himself.

Ø  God bought (purchased) us for himself so that we might be set aside for His exclusive Holy use.

Ø  We have been sealed with the Holy Spirit.

Ø  You can only bear fruit according to your kind.

*Galatians 5:19 – 21 [works of the sinful nature]

Ø  When a man/woman is filled with God’s Holy Spirit, the fruits of the Holy Spirit will definitely manifest

 

2013 Opening Charge:

Ø  The Corinthian Church was a composition of everything. It had both good and bad traits.

*1 Corinthians 1:7 – The Church at Corinth did not lack any spiritual gift at all [see: 1 Corinthians12:7-11]

Ø  The Church was endowed and was very spiritual.

Ø  But the Church had other problems [see: 1 Corinthians 1:10 – 13 there was division in the Church; 1 Corinthians 5:1-8 there was incest and sexual immorality]

Ø  Carnality was the root of the division and immorality [1 Corinthians 3:1-4]

Ø  Note: The Church is made up of many families. There cannot be Church without families.

Ø  The reason why the Church at Corinth was the way it was, was because they were ‘mere men’ and they were worldly, carnal and spiritually immature (babies in the Lord)

Ø  Whenever you find division and quarrelling, there is only one reason for that: you are dealing with ‘spiritual babies

Ø  Spiritual babies are carnal, immature and cannot handle strong/solid food.

Ø  Babies cry for everything and make unrealistic demands; they give fault to other people; they hide things that don’t belong to them.

Ø  When spiritual babies are found in the family, there is bound to be fights, quarrelling and jealousy.

Ø  You must learn to see your partner as a partner, not as a rival whom you are competing against. You should walk, think and work together

Ø  Your relationship with the Lord will definitely reflect in the family. If you are growing in your relationship with the Lord, your relationship with your spouse will also grow

Ø  If you have a healthy relationship with the Lord, you will seek your partner’s happiness

Ø  You cannot be so spiritual and yet not live well at home – it is a contradiction

Ø  You must use God’s Word as a mirror to make all the necessary adjustments in your life